Hola Amigo

Congrats to Spain

Where's my Nail File

There is a new “kid” on the block

Dating sights come and dating sights go. Most of them deliver I suppose a degree of satisfaction.

One usually goes to a site registers a photo, profile, and some contact information. Then you go back at will and see if anyone wants to “hook up”

The new dating sight is called beautiful people. You follow the same procedure BUT THEN the other people on the sight decide wither if you are deserved of remaining on the sight. The measuring stick of their decision is how beautiful you are. If you are deemed not beautiful enough you are informed that because of this you can not have your posted there.

If you want to post if you want to post your profile you can find them @
www.beautifulpeople.net

What's to Eat

An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building. They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, "Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm going to jump off this building."

The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, "Burritos again! If I get Burritos one more time I'm going to jump off, too."

The blonde opened his lunch and said, "Bologna again! If I get a bologna sandwich one more time, I'm jumping too."

The next day, the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage, and jumped to his death.

The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a Burrito, and jumped, too.

The blonde guy opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death as well.

At the funeral, the Irishman's wife was weeping. She said, "If I'd known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have given it to him again!"

The Mexican's wife also wept and said, "I could have given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn't realize he hated Burritos so much."

Everyone turned and stared at the blonde's wife. The blonde's wife said, "Don't look at me. He makes his own lunch."

7 Words

(1937-2008) Thanks George

Yummy

It was during supper that the little boy said, "Are caterpillars good to eat?"

"I've told you before, don't talk about such things at the dinner table," said the father.

The question though, got the mother's curiosity. "Anyway, why did you ask the question, son?"

Replied the boy, "Because I saw one on Daddy's lettuce and now it's gone."

Thank-you Officer

Today I received my second errrrrr maybe my third traffic ticket. I was travelling east on Newman Boulevard when I noticed the flashing lights in my rear view mirror.
Guilty yes guilty I was in a reserved bus/taxi lane.
I was stopped and politely informed of my offence.
Minutes after having given my documents to the officer I was given my ticket. For those of you who have not received a ticket in some time, it is now about eighteen inches long and is printed by a computer (easy to read so there is no mistake of my non innocence)
There are no demerits so I guess it’s kind of a moving parking ticket. Oh ya it’s a 100$ fine for the offence a 44$ for Costs (what cost I have no idea) and a contribution of 10$ (a what ??)
So in the end it is 154$
What a nice day.

Brush With Greatness

Ya know some people meet personalities but today I met one of the most down to earth people that I know. I met Ric Peterson of CJAD fame. I chatted with Ric as he was doing a remote broadcast at Lequipeur clothing store at Hymus and St. Jean.
I imagine that he was of the opinion I was nutbar, but he didn’t let on.
He was the photographer for the pic and apart from a trip to the SAQ he was the highlight of my day
Catch Ric’s show week day afternoons after the four PM news on Montreal’s News Talk Radio 800 CJAD

#501

A man was celebrating his 100th birthday, so the editor of the local newspaper sent a reporter over to do a feature story on the old timer.

The reporter began by asking the old tried and true question, "To what do you attribute your longevity?"

"Well, young lady," the gentleman says, "I never smoked, never drank alcoholic beverages or over-ate, and I got up every morning of my life at six o'clock."

"But, I had an uncle who did exactly the same," the reporter says, "and he only lived to be 80. How do you account for that?"

To which the centenarian replied, "He didn't keep it up long enough."

No Title

Hi Hi
I could have waited till tomorrow (Friday the 13th get it… get it?)
Instead I decided on today. This is entry #500
Thank-you

My Beating Heart

Alright, I couldn’t sing to save my life.
Tonight, however (as a matter of fact it’s still on in he other room) Canadian Idol is till on the air.
I can’t however get over the fact that tonight’s “big” prize is a trip to Toronto.
Goose bumps, screaming down the runway to Terminal 2 at Pearson, or firing along the rails from Guildwood to Union Station.
I’m sorry, maybe Im just a tad cynical, BUT my Goodness, Toronto !!

Now I Got if off my Chest

Today we had an old fashion thunder booming Montreal summer storm…..NOT
There were email warnings, Environment Canada flashes , and the skies even went darkish.
In the end the “storm” lasted a about forty minutes Now as a precautionary I admit that I powered down the computer but that being said I was more distressed about paying 1,49.9 for a litre of gas, Never before had I paid over 40$ to top off my tank. No one seems to give a flying hoot about this stupidity. I am fed up about how expensive fuel is in other places……I don’t live in those other places.
It’s time the government stepped in and did something about taxes (some of which were to cover a government shortage) This shortage has been covered, now drop the damn tax.
Get to the west island by public transport, yes if I have two hours to spare.
I am pleased I have an economical car, live over a restaurant and across the road from a convince store but please ….
Phew….now I feel better

Sweet ...... a Joke

A distinguished young woman on a flight from Switzerland asked the priest beside her, "Father, may I ask a favour?"

"Of course, my child. What may I do for you?"

"Well, I bought an expensive electronic hair dryer that is well over the Customs limits and I'm afraid they'll confiscate it. Is there any way you could carry it through Customs for me? Under your robes perhaps?"

"I would love to help you, dear, but I must warn you: I will not lie."

"With your honest face, Father, no one will question you."

When they got to Customs, she let the priest go ahead of her. The official asked, "Father, do you have anything to declare?"

"From the top of my head down to my waist, I have nothing to declare. "

The official thought this answer strange, so asked, "And what do you have to declare from your waist to the floor?"

"I have a marvellous little instrument designed to be used on a woman, but which is, to date, unused."

Roaring with laughter, the official said, "Go ahead, Father - - Next!"

Cheering up

Today after I had a great lunch with a good friend (Keith Lebrun) from lodge, my car wouldn’t start. George from the restaurant (Barbies) in Dorval got me someone to give me a jump, that didn’t work, but thanks to him anyway.

After a series of phone calls my Honda was successfully towed to Spinelli Honda in Lachine (more successful for the towing company the charged eighty-four plus dollars) I now await for “the call” tomorrow for news.

It was tonight I realized that I am tired.

I’m tired of bad news
I’m tired of the weather
I’m tired of not working
I’m tired of bitching people
I’m tired of not having energy
I’m tired of not winning the Lotto (ok maybe not that one)

As tired as I am however I am great full for David and Kathy who seemed inexplicably with me no matter what. I am also great full for friends who are only a call away.